Anger is Danger = Side Effects
Anger is a human emotion characterized by a strong feeling of displeasure and hostility, precipitated by real or supposed grievances or insults. Like any other emotion, anger is also accompanied by physiological and biological changes. The heart rate and the blood pressure goes up and there is increased discharge of energy hormones such as adrenaline and nor-adrenaline. Changing lifestyle, increasing workload, uncertainty about fate of jobs and organizations; all these are causing stress, worry and anger in today’s work force.
According to Kassinove and his colleague, a study in 1997 revealed, 58% of anger episode included yelling and screaming while less than 10% involved physical aggression. Sometimes anger can be normal and helpful, but this is a very small percentage.
The most common sensations of anger are a tight feeling in the upper chest, flush of warmth in the face and the upper body and the tightening of the jaw. Take a few minutes and try to find out what sensations you feel when you are angry. It is important that you admit to yourself, even if you feel slightest of anger, if you want to improve your life.
Cost of Anger: Often one has to pay a heavy cost for anger. It could result in irrational thinking, could disrupt team performance or could result in decreased motivation levels. Repressed anger is even worse as it could erupt any time and cause irreversible damage. Angry individuals have 3 times higher risk of heart attack if below the age of 55 years and 6 times if above the age of 55 years.
Cause of Anger: Following situation can be responsible for ” triggering ” anger in a person where he/she may find it difficult to exercise patience.
When a person is extremely stressed out, facing difficulties or when things are not moving as expected.
Disappointment at not being able to fulfill expectations, either self-expectations or that of others. (Self directed anger).
When a person is harmed or criticized by others.
Memories of traumatic or enraging events.
Even if anger does not result in violence, if expressed in other un-constructive ways, it can lead to broken family relationship, school suspension, lost jobs and other diminished opportunities for success that can put young people at greater risk for criminal activities.
Medical Causes Of Anger:
Paranoid personality disorder: Individuals with this disorder have a pervasive distrust and suspiciousness of others and interpret their motives as malevolent.
Antisocial Personality Disorder – Individuals who fail to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behavior.
Deceitfulness, repeated lying, cornering others for personal profits or pleasure.
Borderline Personality Disorder – pattern of instability in interpersonal relationship, self – image, intense anger or lack of control of anger with frequent display of temper.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder – patient has pervasive pattern of grandiose sense of self-importance.
Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder – person has pervasive pattern or person has pre-occupation with orderliness and perfectionism interfering with task completion.
Substance abuse disorder
Alcohol and alcohol related disorder
Drug abuse e.g. Cannabis, opium, cocaine, caffeine, other hallucinogens
Manic episode / Hypomanic episode
There are 3 basic style of anger in people
1. The suppressor style
2. The ventor style
3. The manager or director style
The suppressor style sits on or suppresses anger. The person feels that anger is all bad and therefore must be suppressed at all cost. However anger is a natural emotion that cannot be eliminated or suppressed for long.
In the ventor style, the person freely and uncontrollably expresses their anger. These people have no mercy at the heat of moment.
The manager or director style of anger management is usually aware of his anger and uses it in constructive manner. This is probably the best way to manage anger.
·To deal with anger and anger provoking situations effectively and at a comfortable pace.
·To deal with anger that helps to resolve the situation and G To see that intervention does not increase or worsen the existing situation.
There is a difference between being assertive and aggressive. Assertive behavior is a sign of maturity and of a positive thinking person. Assertion means expressing ones rights without encroaching on other’s rights and making them realize, in a peaceful manner, that you are right and the opposite person is wrong.
1. Rational Emotive Therapy
2. Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy
4. Relaxation Therapy/Progressive Relaxation Therapy.
5. Yogic Exercise
Can we make anger work for us? The answer is Yes.
Feeling angry can be beneficial if it motivates us to make necessary changes in our lives and personality. Anger should remind us that we have the power to overcome the obstacle. If we can follow the following equation then we can turn our anger to our advantage:
Anger = Energy = Power
Your anger is like a laser beam. Aim it precisely where it will do you good.
Children and adults can learn the positive values of treating each other with respect and taking responsibility for their own behavior.
Anger Management should include following steps
1. Accept that you get angry and there is a need for change in yourself.
2. Make conscious effort to change your attitude and behavior, each time you realize that a situation has provoked anger, which may require
a. Change of thoughts
b. Change of expressing words
c. Change in emotions
d. Change in external expression – behavior
3. If possible ask yourself the question “will the objective of my anger matter 10 years from now?” After getting the answer we will see things from a calmer perspective about our reactions of anger.
4. Counting from 1 to 10, either forward or backward, before reacting to any provoking situations will be helpful.
5. Consider alternative interpretation in the upsetting situation.
6. Questioning and changing our negative assumptions.
7. Changing the self-take, and the inflammatory vocabulary that triggers the use within.
8. Identifying the triggering stimuli, learning and adapting to alternative behavior, constructive avoidance and disengagement.
9. Relaxation training-especially Progressive Relaxation training, learning to monitor and reduce ones physical state of tension so that anger doesn’t wear you down or lead to further aggression.
10. Associate yourself with people who have positive orientation and thinking.
11. Regular exercise to relax one self.
12.Be honest to self and to others.
13. Accept shortcomings of your life.
Eliminate sarcasm and sarcastic humor from your mind and your daily attitude/behavior.
Make humor a priority, read jokes, watch funny movies, try to incorporate laughing into your daily routine. This diffuses situation that used to make you tense and defensive.
Develop empathy. When someone criticizes you, focus on them and their feelings, and try to imagine how they are feeling. The ability to empathize with others quickly is the hallmark of emotional maturity.
Postpone responses in conversations that provoke anger in you. Physically stop your tongue and breathe especially during heated discussions. You can buy time by saying “I will need time to think about it”.
Posted on March 26, 2015, in Uncategorized and tagged Actress: Can’t Buy Me Love. A life coach, and personal empowerment expert, business consultant, Dr. Lisa Christiansen, health and wellness, Life Coach, Lisa Christiansen, Lisa Christine Christiansen, motivational speaker, self empowerment, success coach. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.